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We build some structures in our lives understanding that they will be temporary. Children enthusiastically build snowmen in the winter and enjoy constructing sandcastles at the beach. We may be thoughtful in putting up a tent for the night or building a duck blind for a season, but we recognize that the nature of such shelters is fleeting. Because of the limited uses and short lifespan of such projects, we invest in them differently than a home, a church building, or a historic structure.

The words we speak are more permeant than we often admit. When it comes to building others up, we must realize that our words today have the potential to make a difference that will echo in eternity.

Believers should never be guilty of flippantly using cutting phrases, sharp criticisms, or demeaning language toward others. Genuine compliments and encouragement should be the mark of Christian conversation while bitterness, vulgarity, and profanity must be banished from our lips. Words have the power to hurt deeply, and their impact lingers long after the exchange is over. Harsh words can knock down the work of years in a moment, and we as believers are to be builders not bulldozers when it comes to our interactions with others.

The apostle Paul writes in Ephesians 4:29, “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.”

In speaking into the lives of others, we must look to remove corrupt communication from our lives. While this certainly includes overt profanity and lewd language, it also includes more subtle ways our speech can be used to erode the spirits of others. Gossip, boasting, half-truths, and mocking jokes made at others’ expense are just a sampling of ways our words can hurt.

As believers, we must appreciate that people are not punchlines and that even passing comments leave a lasting impact. Even after decades, we can remember how being teased as a child, mocked as a teenager, or chewed out by our first boss made us feel. We cannot control the words of others, but we can recognize that the words we release into the world are not simply a temporary venting of frustration but have the potential to impact lives far beyond the moment. Rather than being thoughtless or cruel, we should seek “necessary edification”- choosing to build up those around us with intentionally grace-filled speech.

In seeking to build others up, we should look for genuine strengths in the lives of those around us. We live in a social media, cable-news-saturated world that daily attempts to remind us of all the dangers and darkness swirling close by. When it comes to those we are interacting with face-to-face, we can cut through the noise and notice the blessings our family, friends, and neighbors bring into our lives. In conversation, we can choose to be thankful, positive, and kind thereby building a foundation of honoring God and imitating Christ in all our relationships.

We who experience life in Christ are blessed with His presence now and the confidence of joy in eternity, and yet sadly we can often be surly, standoffish, and suspicious. We dare not be known as cynical, critical, and crude in our interactions with others. While no one perfectly tames the tongue in this life (James 3), we cannot allow corrupting speech to become the default pattern of our conversations.

Our words matter, and we must use them as tools to build rather than weapons to wound as we live out our faith each day.